What then....

Overheard in Bankerland:

Isabella: “Did you cut and paste this entire paper? You didn’t even bother to make it your own?”
Small Dick: “Err…well, yes, I cut and pasted some. But not all….”
Isabella: “You sure not all? Lets take a sampling….here, word for word from the rating report”
Small Dick: “Err…..well, yes…blah blah blah (avalanche of excuses and beating around the bush)”

This seemingly innocent episode precipitated 2 days of coaching and mentoring and closed door mid year reviews that ended in much denial and amazing show of ego from Small Dick. It is about time he is shipped out….


Banker Wanker: “They are insinuating that I tell Capon about the things that go on in the department?”
Isabella: “Yeah, seems so. And that you have certain influence in some of the decisions made on certain individuals etc”
Banker Wanker: “I am real disappointed. I can’t tell if they are genuine now or are they just putting up a front to manage me…..”
Isabella: “I think they genuinely like and respect you, but perhaps with a tinge of wariness”
Banker Wanker: “That is really disappointing…the perception couldn’t be further than the truth”

Stay low, go slow, don’t blow.

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Buzzword in Bankerland : Regionalization

*Banker Wanker trying not to laugh out loud, keeping it all in…bbhrrrrppttttt*

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Omigosh, Sarah’s new album is amazing…..it dost talk to me so. I have been thinking so much about how I am leading my life now, the relationships that I am in, the numbing pain that throbs just below the surface and where I want to be in 10 years time. I am just living for the moment, trying not to look too far beyond today and tomorrow for fear that it is as good as it gets. On the bad nights, Sarah plays in my head, and the notion of leaving this life right now seems to be almost appealing...I could be ready to go you know...I could be.....

Awakenings by Sarah McLachlan

When we first met the well was dry
A long dark winter passed us by
With shooting stars and hopeful hearts our worlds collide
And so we rushed to fill each other in

Quick to feed our hungry hopes
A feast of our affections we were born anew
With open eyes we tried to make it work
And for a while the magic took
But cracks began to show as soon as things got hard

Like paper walls our feelings tore
We threw our backs against the door
Unwilling to bear witness to the other side

Oh, the games we play to hide the tangled dread inside
The fear that we are going nowhere fast
So we point the finger out, the anger gets so loud
It drowns out all the sorrow, at least until tomorrow...what then?

I took a good hard look at how I loved
Years I squandered falling fast
For any boy who'd have me was so insecure
I'd lie awake alone at night
Full of loathing, compromised
And wondering how the hell did I end up like this

Oh, the tears of rage I cried, when nowhere could I find
An answer that made any kind of sense to me
I point the finger out, the anger gets so loud
It drowns out all the sorrow, at least until tomorrow...what then?

Oh I wanna learn, I wanna know
Will our history crush us or can we let it go?
I'm not the girl I was but what have I become?
I'm not so willing anymore to bend
Still pleasing and conceding
But I'm not gonna lose myself again

Opening time

I was in one of the many suburban malls in the Klang Valley on Saturday morning looking for my morning cuppa while I wait for my Japanese tin-can to be serviced. It was way before opening time for most of the shops, so I had to traverse the length of the mall back and forth to find a cosy corner. As I dragged my caffeine deprived legs, I couldn’t help but notice how strangely calming the sight and sounds of shop owners and workers preparing their shop and wares for the day’s opening were. The sound of shutters opening, vacuums, radios’ playing in the background, table and chairs being dragged into position; they all added to an interesting and almost hypnotic cacophony of sounds. For the briefest moment, the scene unfolding right then reminded me of what it felt like to be starting afresh, where the ‘shutters’ were closed the night before and much hope and expectations are placed in a new place or phase in life as one diligently places all their ‘wares’, offering everything they have in hope to find some measure of return, some happiness. Fleetingly, I felt hope again but I know for a fact too that there is no turning back for me now. Too little too late, c'est la vie. I finally found my cosy corner after much meandering, sat down with my cuppa and watched through the window as life passes by....

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Trending in Banker Wanker’s life at the moment:

1. Moonlight, its complicated
2. Bumblebee, on his walker terrorizing the furniture at home
3. Bankerland, slowwwww….wish things would move faster here
4. Alcohol…to numb the ache
5. Sex…the lack of it
6. Pork…poor substitute for 5
7. Sleep…to forget about 1,3 and 5