Our eden's a failure

Overheard in Bankerland

Banker Wanker: “Cepat cepat…bangun, bangun Isabella….”
Isabella: “Coming, coming…..aiyah, mistake again”
Banker Wanker: “Ayuh, ayuh……”
Isabella: “Aiyah, mistake again…..”
Banker Wanker : *smacks forehead*
It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog
It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log…..good help is hard to find these days.



Banker Wanker: “Congrats…you deserve it”
Snoop Dawg: “This is for real? I didn’t expect this….”
Banker Wanker: “There was some lobbying and meetings, but we manage to pull it through”
Snoop Dawg : “Wow, a few more of these and I can be your boss laa”
Banker Wanker: “Your misguided ambition is commendable but ultimately futile at best. Now please, make yourself useful and give me a foot rub then after that, go and wash my car in the car park”
Snoop Dawg : “Only if you allow me to suck your toes and wash your car topless….”
Banker Wanker: “You sick sick puppy…”
Snoop Dawg: “Woof”

+++

Bumblebee is growing real fast now and it is fascinating watching him learn new things every week and seeing his overall physical and mental development. On the good days, I can almost comprehend how some fathers can absolutely adore their offsprings and devote 100% of their entire lives to the well being of their kids with the kind of commitment and sacrifices that I can only dream off and unable to fully proffer in my current state. On the bad days, I feel like the world's burden is on me and that I deserve to be happier and on these days, running away is the overwhelming desire that envelopes me into a catatonic state of ambivalence. Its shameful, I know and please don't judge me. In the eyes of those around me i.e my family on both sides, I am up for nomination for dad of the decade. But, as I have said in my older post, I am only giving my 65%. The other 35% is currently in the wilderness, focused into relationships, work and endeavours that provide me with some measure of sanity albeit short lived in most cases. I hope Bumblebee grows up not ever knowing how screwed up his dad is, it’s a real shame really.


Sarah Mclachlan – U Want Me Too

You walk on by
Clueless and so high
Following your aimless
Path away from us
You're so far away
And what can I say
Cause I can't be the one
You wanted me to be

So tell me
How do you feel
It's so confusing
If you let it all go
It'll fall apart
Do you want me to stay
And say I still want you
U want me 2, don't you?

So what are we saying
Our eden's a failure
A made-up story
To fit
The picture-perfect world
The one with I do's
And I love you
And we are made
For each other
Is forever over now?

And tell me
How do you feel
It's so confusing
If you let it all go
It'll fall apart
Do you want me to stay
And say I still want you
U want me 2, don't you?

I hope there's forgiveness
In the distance between us
Can we make what lies
Ahead of us
A better place to be?