Be Cool, Fool

In song writing, the basic understanding of structure or the ‘form’ of the song must be imbued by the psychological understanding that people have an unconscious desire for symmetry, and that the repetition of melodies, rhymes and form satisfies that need. The repetition of form also sets up a degree of predictability that's reassuring and comfortable to a listener i.e. a verse to start with, then a chorus, back to a verse, perhaps a bridge in between and the finale with the chorus fading. Transpose this to our everyday lives; we are all creatures of habit and the sense of predictability and repetition of routines gives us some form of comfort and the familiar is always such a safe place to be. I wonder if subconsciously, in our approach to relationships, careers and life experiences in general, do some of us follow a set of actions and responses that results in the corresponding outcomes, good or otherwise, that are repetitive and predictable? For example, dating. Obviously its never nice exiting from what seemed to be a great relationship at the onset and then having to go through the whole rigmarole of breaking-up, denial, acceptance and recovery. But subconsciously, I wonder if for some, could the thought of rediscovering new love thereafter or even experiencing the pain and tears of a breakup (yes, some of us can be sadistic that way and for some, pain is associated with the feeling of being alive cause its better to feel something than nothing at all) be so appealing that we “programme” ourselves to find reasons and avenues to engineer an exit, and repeat what we have done in the past cause they feel familiar? Look around you, do you see anyone like that?

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Watch Glee! Great music and characters!

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Sidekick got me a book, The New Dad’s Survival Guide – Man-to-Man Advice For First Time Fathers by Scott Mactavish. It’s a light-hearted manual for clueless fathers on what to expect from pregnancy till a 3 month old baby. I love some of the military styled abbreviations used in the book, which had me cracking up like a sick hyena. Some sampling:

BCF = Be Cool, Fool
NFU = New Family Unit
FPP = Female Parenting Partner

Critical Survival Tip : Your NFU will look just like an alien for her first few minutes of freedom. She may be covered in a waxy white substance or blood. For God’s sake, this is definitely a time to be BCF.

Post labor : Inevitably, the NFU must be taken to the nursery for measurements, cleaning and perhaps testing. It is difficult to watch him go with the nurse, but go he must. Just BCF.

The Discharge : You help the FPP into the car and drive off, happy to be heading home. Be advised, you will instinctively drive very slowly and scream the f-word at anyone who drives up on your back bumper. The FPP will say, “BCF.”

:) Be Cool, Fool....